Waiting for Karma
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Written in Crayon ...@... Waiting for Karma .com
Good Karma ... Only 99˘ ... Cheap! ...@... Waiting for Karma .com

About The Mandarin
I finally lost my "Mandarin" virginity!
The chinese buffet restaurant is the only place
that "The Great Justino" will dine at,
so ...
About Burger King
I've never been in a Burger King restaurant so I'm going to
try really hard to resist and maintain my unblemished record.
About Loopholes
Sometimes you get a second chance.
About Going to the Movies
I'm kinda thinking that maybe the audience
should be getting paid to watch.
You know, to cover time & expenses.
About Les Paul
Farewell Les Paul 1915 June 9 - 2009 August 13
About Losing Touch
Have you ever had someone you've known for years
say or do something so unexpected that it makes you wonder
how well you ever really know anyone?
About Graffiti ...@... Waiting for Karma .com
Graffiti is currently, what? Under review? Pretty much toast?...
because,
after being locked in a relentless six month battle against spam,
I've reluctantly had to retreat & regroup ...
Sooo ... "Graffiti" and "Sign the Guestbook" have been suspended,
pending a weapons upgrade and a "performance review".
To get to Graffiti click on More Graffiti on the News page.
About Summer in Canada
It's finally summer here in Canada and everybody smells like coconuts.
About Loss Leaders
This month I'm playing with actuarial ideas ... ?
If recorded music is free and just a loss leader for live shows,
are recording professionals an endangered species?
Is to ask the answer?
About Vacancies
I dropped by "Electric LarryLand" Studio yesterday and ...
well, actually I didn't because nobody was there.
As my old man would've said, "He's done a moonlight flit."
About You Tube
You Tube is on track to lose $470 million dollars this year.
Whoo Hoo! $$$ !? That's Lots!
When do you think Google will become less charitable?
About Endless Playlists
Listeners include what they like
and exclude what they're "indifferent" about
in their own endless playlist.
About New Mediums
... is this also the end for artists assembling
a collection of songs into a specific order?
About Old Mediums
Now that CD's are reaching the end of the line ...
riff raff records .com . . . presents
Music Written in Crayon ~ vol. 3
Delicious & Nutritious Electric Guitar Tracks
Guaranteed to exceed all nutritional requirements
for extended aural health.
About Old Media
The other day I transferred a few songs from cassette to CD to mp3
for a buddy who read agenda journalism while he waited.
About Anonymous Sources
Credibility evaporates like a vapour trail.
About Personality
I have a friend who is blessed with multiple personalities.
Back when I used to have a personality,
I only had a single semi lame one.
Life's just not fair.
About Being Honest
O'kay, I've got to say that my month long experiment
where I endeavored to jump on the bandwagon
and offer only insults and unqualified criticism
worked out pretty good considering it didn't come to me naturally.
That said, it was nowhere near as entertaining as the month when,
inspired by a ridiculous movie, I decided to make an effort to speak
the whole truth and nothing but the truth so help me Eric Clapton Jeff Beck.
At the time people were justifying their remarks as "just being honest"
but obviously this wasn't the "positive development" you'd expect.
However, getting with the program might earn me some new enemies!
Imagine the possibilities! It's fun! ... Isn't it?
I got to enjoy everything from a slight pinching of the nostrils
to a beet red, bulging veins in the forehead, petulant frenzy!
About Compliments
I think I got that old saying backwards. Maybe it's supposed to be ...
"If you haven't got anything "bad" to say, don't say it."
I'm gonna try it for a month and see how I like it.
About The Canadian Music Marketing Board
According to the latest "Supply Management" regulations
I've written too many songs and exceeded my quota.
In an effort to "protect" music consumers from lower prices
and a wider selection the CMMB has exercised it's mandate
and imposed a 45 day suspension of my artistic license.
Thank You Commissar Summeroff !
About Fresh Perspectives
Everyday is a school day.
About Frank Sinatra
Ol' Blue Eyes passed away ten tears ago today
and he's still giving lessons.
About Feelings
I understand how people feel because
I've had sensitivity training. Twice.
About The Disappearance of Bongo DeLuxe
I don't know him, I've never heard of him,
and I have no idea where he could be found.
About Credits
In order to comply with the latest, stringent, "allowable credit" regulations,
introduced to address the credibility inflation issue,
"Credits" will henceforth be found listed under "Liabilities".
About Time Machines
DNA results confirm that we’re all unique individual time machines.
riff raff records .com . . . presents
Waiting for Karma . . . examining . . . Counterfeit Glory
Martyrs looking for a lost cause & other love songs.
About Progressive Garage Rock
Essentially, I've been working on this concept since I was a kid.
About Audio Forensics
After accidentally hanging a halo of static over a mix
I recalled an interview with the legendary Les Paul
where he said "most people listen with their eyes".
Whew! Lucky for me!
About Remembrance Day
On Remembrance Day we recognize the cost of our freedom.
About Musical Forensics
Sometimes, when I take apart a song that I like
I'm disappointed by what I find.
Magic rarely survives scrutiny under a microscope.
About Creativity
I'm forever trying to find a better way through the next chord.
About The Listening Habits of A & R Guys
Listening for 45 seconds should be regarded as generous.
About Tuning
As part of the war on fun
guitarists are being threatened with ... accurate intonation!

... and now this on 2007 December 7
About Dithering
Now that I've discovered what dithering is
maybe dilly dally can be rehabilitated too!
About Mastering @ the Redline
In a show of support for the "Dynamic Recording" movement
I've cut my Master Level by almost 1 db !! Someone had to go first eh?

Take "The Redline Challenge" Today!
It takes so little and means so much ... Won't You Help?
About Self Doubt
There was a moment a couple of weeks ago when I thought
maybe I should start talking about myself in the third person,
listing my liabilities as credits and showering myself with praise
like everybody else does, but then I snapped out of it.
About Lowering the Bar
Thanks to the influence of celebrity users who are "Lowering the Bar"
pretty soon there won't even be any stigma associated with using a capo.
About Acoustic Guitarists
Acoustic guitarists began migrating away from their natural
"around the campfire" habitat in favour of urban environments
when they were attracted by the "great barrels of fire"
lighting up the entrances to suburban industrial properties.
Cheerfully oblivious to the stigma of "Lowering the Bar",
they enthusiastically clamped their "2 plain" heavy gauge strings down
using a capo and adapted their "around the campfire"
open string style to their new more densely populated habitat.
Nowadays this tradition continues wherever people get together to
"Flick their Bics" wave their cellphones in the air during fun singalongs.
About Acoustic Guitars
I've never found one with a real bridge let alone a whammy bar
so that takes a bit of the fun out of it. Doesn't it?
About The Supernatural
I've been taking clairvoyant lessons every weekend for years
and I still find some things surprising, so I'm going to drop out!
About Social Justice for Drummers
No drummers were used, abused or otherwise harmed in the making of
Music Written in Crayon - vol. 2 >> Slick Electric Guitar Tracks
riff raff records .com . . . presents
Music Written in Crayon ~ vol. 2
Slick Electric Guitar Tracks
Guaranteed to elevate visual productions & satiate sonic desires.
About Rhythm Worker Layoffs
Due to the recent "peaceful" protests by drummers rights activists,
all manual drumming has now been suspended pending the outcome of
a provincial government inquiry into the feasibility of introducing
tempo limits and regulating dangerous time signatures.
About Positive Reviews
From the inside looking out, I can see that
virtually all reviews reveal as much or more about the reviewer
as they do about the subject of the review.
About Negative Reviews
The worst so far was a guy with a tire iron.
Then again, maybe I should interpret it as a positive review
since he clearly understood what I was saying.
About Musical Genres
The walls between musical genres are so thin
that musicians often can't even see them.
About Dynamics
Ever since dynamics were outlawed back in '03 I've been in the red.
About Improving Your Band
One thing that always improves a band is individual practice.
About Sign Language
I was originally a Virgo, but recently, I had my sign legally changed to Leo
and wouldn't you know it! From my new perspective I can see that
it would be twice as good to be a Gemini.
About My Education as a "Hired Gun" Guitarist
When I discovered that my favourite songs
and the songs I was "indifferent" about
were composed of exactly the same chords,
I began to understand that,
beyond the technical qualities of the composition and performance,
which were all that had previously mattered to me,
the "Art" of it lay in the depth and clarity of expression,
and beyond into the underworld of what is being expressed, and why.
About Originality
The most original and unique you can be is to just be yourself.
riff raff records .com . . . presents
Music Written in Crayon ~ vol. 1
Abrasive Instrumental Tracks
Guaranteed to exfoliate stale sonics & leave eardrums refreshed.
About Music Written in Crayon
Waiting for Karma ... removes the language barrier ...
I visualize it as Waveform Porn.
About Recording
16 bit tracks leave a stain that just won't come out.
About Lyrics
The essential difference between poetry and lyrics is that
poetry is meant to be read, while lyrics are meant to be heard.
Even when they're written in crayon.
About Songwriting
Basically it comes down to...?#(xy)@?%&+/-3db>a?b?...=... the next chord,
then the melody threads through the chords...kinda like a musical pinball.
About Guitar
When I was a kid a friend of mine had a guitar teacher
who hated open chords. At the time I couldn't understand why.
About Bass
I'm so glad that I overcame my initial reluctance to play the bass.
I didn't know what I was missing.
About Drums
Only two drummers were harmed in the making of this recording.
About Vocals
If there's no lyric, there's no vocal.

An inspired aesthetic decision!
...and absolutly not a backlash
provoked by singers who pollute the instrumental breaks with
"Nah, Nah, Hey, Hey, or Whoa, Whoa, Whoa!"
About Music
Mine is mostly written in crayon.
About Vending Machines
I always liked the National 620,
but I loved the Seeburg Marquis.
About Science
Every piece of wire is an EQualizer.
About Art
We all start with a blank page and from there
the similarities diminish the further down the page we go.
About "Instant Carma"
Introducing "Instant Carma",
a microwavable synthetic karma substitute
developed to meet today's demands for instant gratification.
Like all acts of passion, simply apply heat
until reaching the boiling point.
Serve hot.
About Waiting for Karma
Waiting, of course, is always the hardest part.
Unfortunately, karma doesn't release it's full textured flavour
until it has been allowed to simmer before cooling off very slowly.
Before serving, chill veins with icewater
and then drizzle with surcharges to compensate for
waiting time & expenses.
Serve cold.
About Karma
It's sort of like justice postponed forever.
Defining Karma
noun: (in Hinduism and Buddhism)

The Collins Dictionary:
1. The principle of retributive justice
determining a person's state of life and the state of his reincarnations
as the effect of his past deeds.
2. Destiny or fate.
3. (informal) An aura or quality that a person, place, or thing is felt to have.

The Oxford Dictionary:
The sum of a person's actions in a previous existence,
thought to decide his or her fate in future existences.

The Random House Dictionary:
Action seen as bringing upon oneself inevitable results,
good or bad, either in this life or in a reincarnation.

The 1949 Funk & Wagnalls New Practical Standard Dictionary:
The law of cause and effect regulating ones future life; inevitable retribution:
a Brahmanic idea developed by the Buddhists.

riff raff records .com . . . presents
Waiting for Karma . . . reminding you to . . . Move Up or Move Over
It's time for your performance review.

Colour Commentary
2005 January 2
It's music ... written in crayon.

2004 August 26
... and so here I am, making colours fly.

2004 May 28
But, a rainbow of colour remains.

2004 May 22
Or lose their shine.

2004 March 15
Sometimes the colours run, or hide.

2003 December 20
Others just failed to take flight.

2003 July 4
Some colours were spilled in the production of these recordings.


Written in Crayon ...@... Waiting for Karma .com
Good Karma ... Only 99˘ ... Cheap! ...@... Waiting for Karma .com